“Somebody said,
that you don’t have a lot going on up there,
but I reassured her,
this can’t be true.
Obviously, you do,
but you walk around
like your head is someplace else.
There’s a student at school
who reminds me of you
He told me, ‘Math is difficult.’
He acts just like you.”
I’m only 35,
and now, I’m in serious cognitive decline.
It’s always been this way
when I spend time
around women.
They like me, and they try to help me
until I can’t help myself.
Maybe, my perception is wrong
but they dominate me
in subtle ways.
My first girlfriend admired my ignorance
until I was putty in her hands.
When I walked away from her
my brain no longer belonged to her
and the gray matter
was left
alone.
Women give me headaches
and then
they relax me
until I don’t have any control
I just let everything go
like an old man.
The world of women is comfortable
until I’m their baby.
I would prefer to die
without any soft, kind, loving
care.
Intellectual Shaman 
You need to find better women and work on yourself. People are terrible and abusive out here, so I get that, but being codependent is not healthy and you deserve better.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes, I hide in the bushes with my binoculars. I find them, but sometimes it’s difficult to talk to them.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Definitely so. They’re not different creatures. They’re humans. You don’t have to impressive or amazing, just normal and secure.
LikeLike
Some of your writing is evidently ‘impressionist’ and some appears to be ‘life’ based. I can’t whether you’re writing the latter from personal experience or from imagination of possible experience. I like that ambiguity in your poems. Either way, keep exploring. 🙂
LikeLiked by 2 people
Sometimes, I can’t even tell, sbwheeler! I’m one of those kids who grew up, and never stopped playing pretend.
LikeLiked by 1 person