Candy and Jackie parked their Beetle and got out. They were naked from the waste up, with no tan lines.

Jacob parked his Civic, and stepped onto Mexican soil.

Gregson looked at green fields, stretching for miles, over the next hill. There were irrigation paths, through the tall grass, like alien crop circles.

Drew parked his Land Rover.

Silas stretched his legs. “I guess this is it. Who wants to go pheasant hunting?”

Drew pulled a side-by-side from his trunk.

Jackie and Candy liked the pump-action.

“Here you go, Gregson.” Silas gave him double barrels. “Do you know how to use that thing?”

“It’s a woman’s gun,” Gregson said.

“Don’t worry—it won’t bite. You look like a man who knows how to use a woman.”

“I do—but there’s a nasty kick, afterwards.”

“Some men like ’em sweet, but you like a bitch that kicks, hugh?”

“With high-heels,” Gregson smiled.

“Now, to do this competition, smartly—we’ll need to pair-off into twos. That way, if there’s a murderer amongst us, they won’t be able to kill, without killing their witness. No killer would be stupid enough to murder their partner.”

“Actually, many murders are committed by married couples,” Gregson said.

“Go figure—Gregson, you pair-off with Candy, and I’ll pair-off with Jackie. Drew—you can have Jacob.”

“Why do I get Jacob?” Drew asked.

“Because you’re married, and we know you don’t have homosexual tendencies—maybe, you’re a bit snooty, which is kinda like acting gay, but we know it’s just because you have money.”

Drew didn’t know how to take this. His white knuckles gripped the barrel, and his trigger finger itched, spasmodically.

“Now, we walk our separate ways for 15 minutes. I’ll blow the air horn. Then try to shoot as many birds as you can. Be sure to fire up. We don’t want any friendly fire.”

Drew was sweating bullets of hate, while he loaded his shotgun, staring at Silas.

“So, tell me Gregson… do you have a girlfriend?” Candy asked. She walked in front of him, like the leader she was, while he admired her Candy ass.

“Not at the moment.”

“Are you looking?”

Gregson looked up, for fear of being caught. “How long has it been?”

“Only five minutes.” Candy turned around and looked deep into his eyes. Then she kissed him, and unzipped him, and they lay in the grass, and later heard the airhorn, mixed with shotgun blasts. Birds flew above them, and they ignored the fowl. It was not worth killing, when love could be had on the ground.

More shotgun blasts… and a scream.

Gregson sat up, and Candy rolled off. “Cover my ass,” Gregson said. She gave him his cargo shorts.

“No—with your shotgun.”


“We’ve got to find Jacob and Drew.”

“What about Silas?”

“If I’m not mistaken—he’s already killed Jackie.”

“How do you know?”

“The sound of double barrels. I would recognize that gun, anywhere.

Candy started to cry.

More shotgun blasts. Then Gregson and she came to a clearing of blood.

Drew and Jacob were dead.

“Killed by an expert marksman,” Gregson said.

“Or a markswoman?”

“I don’t think so. We have to be careful now. Silas has years of military training.”

Another shotgun blast.

Jackie’s head was on the ground, half-missing.

Silas was pointing his barrels at Gregson. They faced off.

“Give it up,” Gregson said. “You can’t kill us both.”

“With a shotgun, I can. You killed Jackie!”

“What are you talking about? She was your partner!”

“You got her, only a moment ago.”

“No, I didn’t. I was with Candy.”

“You are both murderers!”

“Hold on!” Detective Talbert walked out of the tall grass, pointing his six shooters in both of their directions. “I’ll get to the bottom of this—you’re all under arrest!”

Silas lowered his shotgun, and Talbert put handcuffs on.

Gregson lowered his shotgun, but the detective didn’t arrest him. “You said I was guilty too.”

“I know I did, but are you kidding? I know you didn’t do it. I just wanted this guy to lower his weapon. Silas—you must’ve had a grudge. What was it? Your peers were too successful? Or, let me guess—you’re a misogynist?”

Silas rolled his eyes. “Just take me to my cell.”

“That’s what the detective orders,” Talbert said.

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