The man is more beautiful
with each passing year
while the woman is worn
with too much love, or not enough love at all.
She does her makeup in the mornings
fixing her eyelashes and mascara
while the man barely has time to grab a piece of pizza
and he’s out the door.
Women get into power
and they over-inflate the importance of their work—
they trade their identity, marital status, motherhood
for dollars, for paper, for status, for a parking space.
Men have been working for hundreds of years
and they realize a job is only three letters
The boss can shove it up their ass—it’ll fit.
It’s nothing to trade their life for.
Women have been deceived, by snakes
“You can have it all. You won’t die. Men will worship you, and you can be just like a man.”
A woman in power, is like a referee
Players frequently get disqualified for foul behavior
I was friends with my boss’s husband
“I took her fishing,” Tom said. “Caught a trout, but she wouldn’t eat it. I had to eat it, myself. Would you like to come over and watch the football game this weekend?”
“Sorry Tom—but it would be weird. Your wife keeps me at arm’s length, and it would ruin our long-distance relationship.”
“You’re right,” Tom said.
He was disappointed. Beaten. He was like an old little boy who had to make his own lunches and dinners in the microwave, by spreading peanut-butter on white while his wife was at District meetings. He wasn’t going to make it. It might be true that a woman don’t need no man, but it sure as hell isn’t true, that a man don’t need no woman. Men would be insane, to say this—so, what does that say about the modern woman?