How few of us

know the answers, to the few questions

we ask, in this life.

It can take a life-time

to get the answer to one important question

like, “Who am I?”

and then, you can never be sure

you didn’t invent the question, or invent the answer.

I met a sad, disappointed, man

with parted hair, a t-shirt tucked in

to polo shorts, held-up, by a shiny belt.

His children do not believe the way he believes

His library is full of his beliefs, confirmed by others, who believe him

they all agree, the other beliefs, are wrong.

I am not at war, but there are those who would say I am in rebellion

If you can ask, anyone, one Original question

you are a threat

whether, in politics, religion, culture, or any domain where the human needs to be right

and is convinced, he is right.

The human is dangerous, because he feels his way, into everything

like a naked man, lost in the dark, looking for the light-switch

after the power goes out.

A man trusts his feelings, in so far, as he has been told it’s okay

I am surprised, by the surprising lack of insight

in the men I know

they are so convinced, they are right

and when they look into a woman, they are terrified, by what they find

tortured by inconsistencies and incongruities

“I love you, for you,” she says.

“What does it mean when my girlfriend says that I don’t need to get a better job?” My friend asks.

“I think it means, she loves you, for you.”

“No. No. It’s controlling behavior,” my friend says. “Now, I have to put her in line and make sure that she follows my lead.”

We look into others, and see ourselves, without knowing it

and we are terrified by what we find

There are many women I thought I loved, in the moment

and I believed I could love them, for a lifetime

but they did not love me

and now they are only a distant memory

and my feelings don’t long for them

the way they felt, a long time ago.

I know this man, 70 pounds overweight

70 years old

and convinced he will die, any day

but he hasn’t, and he has been convinced

since I’ve known him

and he visits the grave of a woman he loved 30 years ago

His crush,

and she didn’t love him back

and he hasn’t gotten better with age

white whiskers clinging to his many chins

but he still feels, for the woman he loved

this world refuses to love itself

people think they love

but it’s something else

If you ever get a chance to look inside yourself

you will probably need God

the answers to the questions we think we know

are not any more foolish

than the faith we possess

the changes in ourselves, allow us, to see the changes in others

and to genuinely see another person

that is the big mystery

If we see others, without seeing them

and they see us, without seeing us

What are we looking at?

11 thoughts on “What are we looking at?

  1. Yes…’people think they love, but it’s something else’….If it’s not empowering and freeing…it’s probably not love. I will need to give some thought to those last lines. Intriguing poem. 💙

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I like the inference of that line ‘and she didn’ t love him back’.
    Wonderful as always. Have you read D. H Lawrence? I’m reading his ‘The Rainbow’ and their are a lot of parallels with your poem and the self-talk of his characters with their predicaments in relationships.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Such a complex and thought provoking piece. I often wonder sometimes if people fall in love first with what they subconsciously see of themself in another. Why so many couples often look alike? I like the ending question though because it’s so often true. To get out of one’s own way to really see another is not always an easy task. Again, nice work!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Thought provoking poem. You have expressed so beautifully.
    It’s true deep down we love ourselves and we search same love, same commitment towards us from others…without realizing same is true for others!
    Wanting to “fill in the blanks”, feel complete only if someone we love, loves us back…is a biggest myth.

    Liked by 1 person

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