you have taken something and made it yours,

but it never belonged to you in the first place

if you can eat well

and sleep well

and do the thing that gives you hope

if you can listen to the sane

and not go insane

and hear the wisdom

they wouldn’t dare share

with anyone else

if you can spot the falseness

even when there is more of it

than what’s real

and not become false

yourself

if you can wait patiently

not heeding the encouragement

or discouragement

your time dies

but you live on.

I haven’t made a fortune yet

and I hardly think I have the constitution

for it

but making money from words

is magic

I mean, who pays someone for talking

but wait…

there are teachers

politicians

and the women who seduce rich men for money

Again,

I guess there are poets too.

I always wanted to make a living

doing something impractical

I thought, “I’ll just let someone tell me their problems.”

And later I thought, “I’ll just write some words down.”

Neither have worked the way I hoped they would

But I guess I’m not surprised

My friend solves math problems

for a living

that nobody understands

and I guess we’re not that different

the material world doesn’t add up

and mostly, I think about the friends I’ve lost

they’re more valuable than gold

especially when you meet the fools

pedaling the false stuff.

Now, I have people reading my writing

like lawyers or pharisees

or psychologists

with bad intentions

you know who you are

but I change so often

I don’t know myself

and it was

and is

just a beautiful dream.