“Congratulations Budd, what are you going to do with your degree?”

“I don’t know… maybe I’ll be a lecturer.”

“Those jobs are really hard to get. You know… you might try to get a continuing ed job—they’re less competitive.”

“Oh, thanks.”

“You know Budd, I tried to print something on mom’s computer and it took 30 minutes…”

“I know, I did my taxes on that computer. I finished and then dad tried… the swear words were flying.”

“The reason your mother’s computer is slow is because of the anti-virus software she installed on it,” my brother-in-law said.

“I know, I have McAfee. It wants me to renew, and I don’t know which button to push to Not renew. Now it pops up in Spanish and Russian. I don’t trust anti-virus developers. Have you seen the documentary on McAfee?”

“No.”

“Well, it might be something you’re interested in. He was a sexual deviant.”

“I’m not interested in those sorts of people.”

“Oh, that’s not what I meant. I know you’re not a sexual deviant.”

“That stuff doesn’t interest me.”

“What does interest you?”

“I don’t know… everything.”