It doesn’t help to think about what I don’t love
and most of the time
I am reminded of it
like an alarm clock that goes off
when I want to sleep
or a car that honks
when I was supposed to go
It isn’t distance
from hateful things
that I long for
it is the absence of hate
My mind reacts
when poked
And now it knows
not to poke back
But even still, it tries to sift
through the lingering resentment
like sand that might blow away
into nothing
And there is always someone or something
who sees my happiness
and tries to poke it
to see if it is real
You have to bury it
deep inside
like a cheerful bird
you say to be silent
it sings in the spring
flys in the summer
nests in the fall
and gives you eggs in the winter
Even though you put on a serious face
Some hear your song
inside
and smile
Our birds sing
in unison
a silent chorus of hidden joy
from the empty aviaries of misery
long ago abandoned
just feathers
and droppings
and silent noise
Never lose your bird
feed it wonderful worms of wisdom
and keep listening to your song
inside.